Yes I am writing about some guy’s beer league team

(This post is part of a fundraiser for 826 Boston, a non-profit tutoring and writing center. For a donation of $50 or more, readers can get me to write anything about hockey they want, so donate today to make me say stuff by clicking here. I probably don’t believe the nonsense below, which was requested by John.)

If you want to talk about the one guy who’s more valuable to his team than any other in the sport of hockey it’s probably Jack Eichel, who has Boston University in the national title conversation despite the fact that they’re decidedly not-great when he’s off the ice.

But beyond that, I think a pretty good case can be made for Cory Green, who plays for B-Dubs in the Chiller Adult Hockey League E-level. The team itself is 4-1-2 in seven games, and almost every player on the team is well below a point per game. Green, however, has 11 goals and 15 points. (One assumes he’d have more if the rest of his teammates could keep up with him.)

In fact, Green’s 11 goals equals the total scored by the rest of the team’s forwards combined.

Another strong contributor is defenseman Ashish Nagpal, who has 5-2-7 in three games. Think how much better this team would be if he showed up. You know he’s one of those guys bombing in point shots every chance he gets, despite the fact that this is a beginner’s league and no one besides these two guys is very good on most nights.

The club is backstopped by Jeffrey Svoboda, who has allowed 26 goals in his seven games, and I have no idea if that’s good for this league. The three teams in front of them in the standings have allowed 10, seven, and 10, all in seven games, so I’m gonna say: Not great.

But if you’ve only lost one of seven games in regulation, that’s not nothing, right? Probably reasonable to assume that this is a team with a lot of character, good in the room, that sort of thing. They work hard and get to the contested areas of the ice, which leads to their high shooting percentage and so on.

But the best thing of all the fun stuff in the Monday E Chiller league is that a guy named Bryan Fury, who plays for a team called “The Crue,” leads the league in penalty minutes with 16 in six games played. Of course he does.

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