Jack Edwards is the best in the business

(This post is part of a fundraiser for 826 Boston, a non-profit tutoring and writing center. For a donation of $50 or more, readers can get me to write anything about hockey they want, so donate today to make me say stuff by clicking here. I probably don’t believe the nonsense below, which was requested by Asmae.)

The fans want what they want, and what they want is reasonable coverage of their teams on local television.

“Reasonable” can of course mean all kinds of things, but the biggest thing it means is “very locally focused.” You know that thing where, like, fans of teams — particularly teams which are good — think that the guys in the national media have it out for them? “So-and-so hates theCaps/Pens/Wings/Flyers/Bruins/Rangers/Leafs/Habs/Canucks/Avs/etc.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” gets shouted a lot.

Likewise, so does, “Of course (so-and-so) would say that, he loves the Caps/Pens/Wings/Flyers/Bruins/Rangers/Leafs/Habs/Canucks/Avs/etc.!!!!!!!!”

Fans want to see guys who will root, root, root for the home team no matter what, which is why people who don’t watch a lot of Avalanche games, for example, think the guys on Altitude are so painful to listen to, while those in the greater Denver area generally love them.They’re jokes to outsiders, because of how baldfaced their homerism is, and beloved by the locals, for precisely the same reason. This is also true in Pittsburgh, Philadelphia, New York, Toronto, Montreal, and especially Boston.

Jack Edwards, the play-by-play man for the Bruins, is the shining example of a fanboy announcer who can’t believe that Boston would ever do anything but win handily and leave their opponents as simpering, bloody pulps to be scraped out of the corners by the hard-workin’ ice crew at TD Garden. No one does this schtick better, and I’d really doubt that anyone ever has.

I mean, just look at that reaction to the Game 7 win against Toronto a few years ago.

The fist pumps! The stabbing analogy! The stabbing motion! It literally doesn’t get any better than that. People eat that stuff up, and that’s why Edwards has remained gainfully employed despite embarrassing himself on air many times in the last few years. It’s the Bruins who pay his salary and make decisions on who to hire and fire, after all, so this is really just the ultimate in sucking up to the bosses, especially if you also happen to be a huge fan of seeing your company do well.

This is the level of homerism to which all other local broadcasters in the sport really ought to aspire, because you’re basically guaranteed job security for decades. And hey, let’s not act as though it’s not entertaining. Because it 100 percent is. Among people who aren’t Bruins fans, it’s maybe not for the reasons people might aim overall, but you can’t argue with the effectiveness. Nobody’s better at this than Jack Edwards. And probably no one’s even close.

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