The Two-Line Pass

The Lead

Here is how terrible my life is: Midway through the Flames game I was invited out to enjoy a few beverages with some friends of mine. This was acceptable to me as the Flames game was on Versus and not just Center Ice, and thus I was assured that more or less any sports bar I went to would have the game. When I left, it was 1-1.

While driving there, I was informed via phone call that Mike Cammalleri had put Calgary up 2-1 with about 16 minutes remaining. By the time I arrived at my destination though, it was tied again, and I watched the remainder of regulation with bated breath hoping that my dear Flames would somehow pull out a miracle victory in hostile territory against a team to which they had lost 11-3 on aggregate in Chicago.

But then the Blackhawks won on a Marty Havlat goal just 12 seconds into overtime. Except I didn’t see it. The reason for this is that each table at this bar had its own individual television, and my friend insisted we change the station because he had bought a lottery ticket and he wanted to see if he won any money.

He obviously did not.

What happened instead was I was teased into believing that the Calgary Flames, who have been playing abysmal hockey since the trade deadline, had the slightest bit of a chance to win *a* game in this stupid series. They had, to that point, dictated flow and pace through sheer force of will and physicality, but because my stupid retard friend can’t get even one out of six numbers to match the lottery draw, I missed the Flames reassurance that my complete lack of faith in them was entirely justified.

My friend, who is not a hockey fan, did not quite understand just why I was so incensed. And I told him I wished that only lottery he won was derivative of a Shirley Jackson short story.

Elsewhere…

Boston 4, Montreal 2

I did see this game in its entirety, and it was quite outstanding. So many memorable moments. Carey Price bitching to the ref that he had covered a puck that he clearly did not come close to covering, Alex Kovalev breaking the sound barrier on a one-timer that was positively wired to the upper 90, the complete physicality of the game, and the way everything about the contest and the atmosphere was so incredibly evocative of Playoff Hockey. If every game for the rest of the playoffs were exactly like this one, it would be incredible for the sport. Another memorable moment, of course, was when a different friend of mine mistook Zdeno Chara’s home country for the Czech Republic, which is, of course, not right. Chara is Slovak and would therefore be incredibly upset to have this mistake made. Basically all my friends are morons.

Detroit 4, Columbus 1

I am hoping that the Jackets win this series just so I don’t have to hear the following sentiments ever again: “Chris Osgood is so good in the playoffs,” “Boy the economy is really making it hard for the Joe to sell out,” and “Johan Franzen is totally worth that 11-year extension.” These are all mind-numbingly stupid things to say. Chris Osgood sucks regardless of the gravity of the game, the Joe isn’t sold out because “HOCKEYTOWN” is maybe one of the worst hockey towns in North America and Johan Franzen isn’t worth an 11-year extension no matter how many goals he scores in the playoffs because he’s already 29.

Anaheim 2, San Jose 0

Well I guess that’s how you set a tone for a series. San Jose was physically punished tonight at just about every turn (be it within the boundaries of fair play or not). I have no problem with teams playing the way the Ducks did tonight because, what the hell, it’s the playoffs. The Sharks clearly had no answer for the Ducks’ intensity or desire tonight and, well, it’d be kinda funny if that trend continued. First because somehow the playoffs make the antics of Ryan Getzlaf and Corey Perry more palatable (and almost Avery-like in their adorableness) and second because it’d be funny to see the Sharks get 86ed in the first round yet again.

This entry was posted on Friday, April 17th, 2009 at 2:49 am and is filed under Good night. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.