Good night: My life is almost as awesome as Olli Jokinen
The Lead
In the late afternoon, someone dropped this comment on my internetting website:
Still waiting on the recap of how wonderful Jokinen’s been for the Flames. That was a good piece:
http://thetwolinepass.com/2009/03/good-night-which-scary-looking-freak-is-laughing-now/
Really enjoyed the one goal he’s scored the past three games, and the three game-losing streak. He was a BADASS deadline pickup. You’re right! YEAH!
Wellity wellity wellity. Hows about the two goals and the shootout-winning goal he scored tonight? How about it, eh? Mr. Jokinen and myself anxiously await your heartfelt apology.
Here, then, is your “recap of how wonderful Jokinen’s been for the Flames:” SUPER F’N WONDERFUL, THAT’S HOW! Three goals in four games and five in five since joining Calgary. How’s that grab ya, buddy? Plus a shootout game-winner. Is that awesome enough? Where does it rate on your scale of “BADASS”-ery?
Olli Jokinen was a third-period monster for the Flames tonight, scoring what was, at the time, the game-tying goal and helping Calgary dictate the pace and tone of the game against Detroit that his new team ended up winning 6-5 in a shootout.
If these are the side effects of dressing room cancer, please, please give me a friggin’ unhealthy crapload of it, because tonight’s game was so awesome that I can’t even stand it. Jokinen scored twice tonight in addition to the aforementioned shootout winner, keying Calgary’s comeback that many in the business would consider, umm, improbable.
For one, Calgary was outshot in the first period an incredible 28-4. For real. It also had 21 more penalty minutes than did the Red Wings, who benefited from one weaksauce call after another (one need only look at Dion Phaneuf’s 5-minute “boarding” penalty on Dan Cleary to see the ludicrosity (that MUST be a word) of the calls the Flames were catching tonight). And yet, after killing off what must have been six minutes of 5-on-3 hockey, the Flames entered the dressing room down 2-1. Then things kind of got away from the Flames, who trailed 4-2 for the majority of the second and third period.
I, admittedly, had written the game off as a lost cause, and certainly found myself shocked by Jamie Lundmark’s two-goal night that, along with Jokinen’s third-period marker, put the Flames up 5-4 (thanks to three goals in 3:12 late in the third) before Jokinen broke his stick while Detroit had the extra attacker on and scored the game-tying goal.
Mike Cammalleri and Jokinen scored very nice shootout goals to lock up the win. Miikka Kiprusoff, by the way, made 36 saves, many of which bordered on miraculous, and earned the win.
Best game I’ve watched all season, and there’s not even a close second.
And really, I still cannot believe it.
Interestingly, later in the day, the same commenter from above also posted this:
Watched him vs. Carolina … he was his normal aquarium-headed self.
Jokinen’s always been the first- or second-best player on losing teams. That’s his M.O.
Yeah, how’d that work out tonight? Ol’ Aquarmium-head SMOKED one of the two best teams in the NHL. The other player that did it was Jamie Friggin’ Lundmark.
Guess I was right once again.
“LC,” the fantabulous Mr. Jokinen and I accept your apology preemptively. Because we’re that f’n amazing.
Elsewhere…
Boston 5, Edmonton 3
Heeeeeey Boston won a game. And all it took was running into the Ottawa Senators to get it done. A commendable feat, to be sure. How ’bout big Phil Kessel scoring two goals to get his 28th and 29th of the year? Maaaaan, I remember when he was on pace to score like 50 or 55. THAT Phil Kessel would’ve made sure the Bruins didn’t lose a million games in a row before tonight. I wonder what happened to him.
Buffalo 3, Florida 1
Well now the Buffalo Sabres will make their stand for a playoff spot. And they, of course, won’t get it. Not without Ryan Miller, who’s still out for another 12 years, I think. By the by, Florida’s goal was scored by Michal Repik, of whom I have never heard Word One. Where did this gentleman come from? Why does he have two goals already this year?
New Jersey 5, Phoenix 2
Like you didn’t see that coming. Assume Zach Parise scored 15 goals tonight (actually just the one). Fun fact: Phoenix’s goalie tonight, Josh Tordjman, is LISTED at 6-foot-1, 157 pounds. One hundred and fifty-seven pounds. No joke. He weighs like seven pounds or so more than me despite being much taller and he is somehow a professional athlete. I don’t know whether that’s impressive or pathetic on his end. Hit the gym, kid, and maybe you won’t give up five goals on 36 shots.
Washington 2, Philadelphia 1
Oh I wonder who had the game-winner. Alex Ovechkin? Really? This is a shocking revelation.
Columbus 4, Pittsburgh 3 (OT)
When they read the result of this game on the FSN Detroit broadcast, I got very excited. Not because it was an overtime win for the Blue Jackets, but because they announced it, no joke, as Stevie Mason’s 10th shutout of the year. Because of the amount of help it would give my fantasy team, I was, uhh, pumped and/or jacked. And as a result of reading the ACTUAL, I would like to use this space, if I may, to explain the difference between the number “three” and the number “zero.” The difference is THREE. Three goals, three bananas, three idiot televison announcers who cannot count. THREE, alright? T-H-R-E-E! Tre, trois, tres, ثلاثة, три, 三, drvo, tři, drie, kolm, tatlo, kolme, drei, τρία, שלוש, तीन, három, tiga, 세인, trīs, trys, tlieta, trzy, três, trei, дрво, tri, สาม, üç, ba. That’s as many languages as Google Translate recognizes. Hopefully you morons can go out and learn Catalan for “three,” because you got my hopes up unnecissarily. As a consequence, I am glad your stupid team lost.
Tampa Bay 4, Toronto 1
Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares. Toronto loss Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares Tavares.
New York Islanders 3, Montreal 2 (OT)
Yann Danis was a man on a mission tonight. He stopped 24 of 26 shots and was awesome. Carey Price was too. But not AS awesome as Danis, who once played for the Habs but was allowed to go for free! I couldn’t understand it either, believe you me. Interestingly, Mike Iggulden scored in this game, and I find his name to be too similar to Jarome Iginla’s to be acceptable.
New York Rangers 4, Nashville 2
Sean Avery had a goal. That’s all that matters. … Well actually, I guess it also matters that Henrik Lundqvist, who was playing with the flu, didn’t vomit on Vernon Fiddler. I mean, to Vernon Fiddler, and pretty much only him. If there was video of an elite NHL goalie puking on a marginal third-liner, I would watch it about 1,187 times in a row on Youtube. You couldn’t stop me.
St. Louis 3, San Jose 1
Typo. Has to be. Blues three, Sharks one. That’s hilarious. Great gag, everyone. Where’s Dom Deluise to tell me it’s all a big yuk-fest and I’m on Candid Camera and isn’t that funny? Because there’s no way in Hell the Blues beat the Sharks anywhere on the globe. Cannot have happened. But say it did, right? Is this just prep for the second round of the playoffs? I say yes, since Barrett Jackman scored and all.
Dallas 3, Carolina 2
Eric Staal put in a grade-A effort, but it just wasn’t enough. By the way, I will never tire of thinking about Bubba from Canes Country’s insistance that I should consider Staal’s non-Conn Smythe-winning playoffs IN 2006(!) to be enough to grant him a pass on two crumb-bum seasons since. It will always continue to be the second-best thing that ever happened to me right behind tonight’s Flames win.
Colorado 2, Minnesota 1 (SO)
It’s a rare night indeed that I find myself actively hoping for an Avalanche win, but they’re so far out of the playoffs that it’s harmless. Minnesota, on the other hand, is not a team I want to represent the Northwest come playoff time. Leave your boring, Gaborik-less asses at home, we in the Northwest need to let everyone know just who we be. Can’t have you mucking it all up, can we?
Atlanta 4, Edmonton 3 (OT)
Since the Flames lost to the Thrashers in a considerably more-terrible situation over the weekend, I feel confident in saying this to Edmonton: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA YOU GUYS ARE SO AWFUL OH MAN! Oh, and Ilya Kovalchuk got just 46 seconds of ice time tonight and I’m too lazy to look up why. Please inform me posthaste.
March 13th, 2009 at 8:57 am
Maybe if aquarium head didn’t break his stick it wouldn’t have taken OT to beat the lousy Wings! Ever think of that, huh!?
March 13th, 2009 at 10:45 am
Like I said, good player on bad teams. Jokinen’s teams have been going 2-3 over five-game stretches for the past decade. And now they’ll lose Cammalleri in the offseason b/c of his contract.
By the way, still minus-1 last night.
March 13th, 2009 at 12:41 pm
Jokinen is the playoff Angel of Death. It’s true.
March 13th, 2009 at 6:04 pm
“Wellity wellity wellity.” - This should be this blog’s tagline
March 14th, 2009 at 4:04 am
a Simpsons reference I’d never seen in print before….well played. And I know Jokinen helped Phoenix embarrass my Jackets all year, I think you guys are the last team I want to play in the first round, including SJ and DET.
March 14th, 2009 at 10:39 pm
So the Flames are 2-4 since the trade, yet Jokinen is playing well. May be there’s something wrong in the locker room. Like, a cancer or something joined them 6 games ago.
March 16th, 2009 at 8:27 pm
You guys are all fucking retarded if you think that jokinen automatically makes the players around him worse.
March 16th, 2009 at 9:02 pm
Nope .. but he’s not the answer either.
March 17th, 2009 at 12:01 am
the answer to what question exactly
July 7th, 2009 at 6:46 pm
I played only a few weeks with OJ and can say he is a decent player but seemed to have no interest in being part of our team. He isn’t a “cancer” that some say but he didn’t seem to want to come out for any function, didn’t want to join in any discussion and he didn’t seem to show Jerome any respect. I think the Flames will regret trading for him and not being able to retain Mike.