Good night: Jesus Christ! This guy is everywhere!

The Lead
It must be confusing as hell to cover the Sedins. The Stars had a bit of trouble with it tonight. It’s like the opening of the Patty Duke Show, only with Swedish guys. And goatees. And less choreography.
Those rascally boys combined for three goals and two assists as the Canucks pounded Dallas tonight 5-2.
The best part was when Mark Fistric high-sticked Daniel right in the kisser, knocking out a tooth or two and bloodying him up. Daniel then scored on a very nice redirect on that same power play before heading to the dressing room to get stitched up. That’s badass. Earlier in the game, Henrik caught a stick in the noodle as well. I’d like to see Patty Duke pull that off.
Another rad part of the game was when Steve Ott stepped out of the penalty box and low-bridged the absolute piss out of Taylor Pyatt (as he is wont to do), and Kevin Bieksa basically threatened to murder him in the resulting scrum. I wish more people would deal with Ott this way.
But then Ott did not get much in the way of retaliation, unfortunately. Marty Turco did instead, mainly because he came out to play the puck along the sideboards, turned his body to protect it from a coming forechecker (I believe it was Darcy Hordichuk), and promptly got cleaned out from behind. It was hilarious.
Then the Canucks broke it open in the third period and Ryan Kesler scored a gorgeous goal, his second of the night after getting his head stepped on, and Dallas completely imploded. Turco ended up giving up four goals on 21 shots.
I know that, as a Flames fan, I shouldn’t be rooting for the Canucks to win, but this game was so awesome I don’t care.
Elsewhere…
Toronto 3, Washington 2 (SO)
Something made Martin Gerber flip the F out in this one. He got tossed near the end of regulation, which ended up being for the best. Curtis Joseph was a monster in relief, making nine saves in 5:57 of ice time and helping the Leafs pull out an improbable win over the Caps. Alex Ovechkin did something before the game that will piss Don Cherry off too, so that’s kinda funny.
New York Rangers 2, Minnesota 1
Marian Gaborik’s back! Just in time for Mikko Koivu’s knee to fall off! Gabby had a goal! It didn’t matter! I know, I know. A 2-1 game featuring the Wild? Get outta town, fella.
Montreal 6, Atlanta 3
Whoa, Bob Gainey wins! That should really read: “Alex Tanguay wins.” He had five points. That’s good news for me in my fantasy hockey playoffs. That’s also the only reason I care about this result at all.
Tampa Bay 2, Columbus 1 (OT)
Interesting thing about this game: Tampa finished the game with 17 shots. Real low total. But impressive considering they had seven THROUGH TWO PERIODS! I was really hoping for a sub-10 total, and it wasn’t out of the realm of possibility since they only had two in the first period. Poor Steve Mason. Getting outdueled by Mike McKenna? Cripes.
Anaheim 2, Nashville 1 (SO)
Lots of loser points getting handed out tonight. Nuts to both of these stupid teams.
St. Louis 2, Los Angeles 0
Actually, scratch that thing about the last game. If Nashville had won in regulation, all five teams in the Central would be in a playoff position. Wouldn’t that be crazy? It would be. Believe me. The Blues are a point back of the Ducks for eighth, and the Preds are tied with Anaheim. See? Crazy.
Detroit 3, Edmonton 2
For the second night in a row, Detroit farted their way through the first two periods. Then they scored three goals in 7:19 in the third period and won 3-2. Dwayne Roloson continues to play his balls off. He had 41 saves tonight. Poor son of a bitch.
March 25th, 2009 at 9:21 am
I don’t think I’ve mentioned it, but I’m enjoying the MS Paint photos every morning.
September 7th, 2009 at 6:40 pm
It’s September, 6 months or so since you posted this entry, and I’m laughing myself stupid at the “Awesometown” joke. I don’t know how I found your blog, but this shit is great and I’m bookmarking the hell out of it. Good or bad, I’m hoping to see some funny pictures and captions about my Sabres next season.